Hope this letter finds you and the Missus doing well.
Thanks for the set of new wine glasses last Christmas. Nothing personal, but I’ll be re-gifting them to the in-laws this year. This way I’ll have enough money left over for a new pair of Jimmy Choo’s to donate to the Salvation Army.
It’s been over a year since we’ve last been in touch. And lately, I’ve been thinking – it’s always about me. My wants. My needs. You’re always so attentive, picking up on all the little things going on in my life – when I’m sleeping, when I’m awake, when I’ve been bad or good. You always listen to all of my dreams – whether on sale or at full price. You respect my decisions and never resort to petty coal-in-the-stocking shaming (even when you knew it was me who pulled the mall fire alarm to get my holiday shopping done faster). You intuit my mind and ensure that gift receipts come with all my husband’s presents – including the new micro-fiber car detailing cloths he bought me last year. And I appreciate that.
So this year, Santa – this year, it’s time it was about YOU. You deserve that. And there are some things that have come to my attention that I think it’s time we talked about…
Santa, You’re Just Not Happy…And I Think I Know Why…
Now, we’ve known each other for a long time. So I’m just going to come right out and say it – it’s your personal grooming habits. In all this time, I’ve never seen you wear anything but for that same lanky red velvet jump suit. And I can’t even remember the last time you shaved. I can barely see your face – I probably wouldn’t even know you from some guy in a costume. Shabby-Chic has come and gone Santa, something clearly isn’t right here. I think you’re hiding something…
And then there’s your working hours. It’s always the night shift with you, creeping into our houses after you’re certain we’ve all fallen asleep. No one sees you anymore. And now that you’ve gone and outsourced all your work to these Elf on the Shelf® people, you barely ever leave your workshop at all these days. If it wasn’t for your live Twitter feed, people would start to think that you don’t even actually exist. You’ve been avoiding all real social interaction. It’s just not healthy.
Word has also gotten out about your situation at home. The YouTube videos are all over Facebook: elves drinking on the job, elves reindeer-tipping, elves Instagramming season’s greetings cards with mistletoe pinned to their butt cheeks, etc. And Rudolph getting hammered on eggnog and crashing your sleigh – AGAIN?!?! What’s going on here??? You use to be a take-charge kind of man, commanding authority and respect. You just aren’t yourself anymore.
You’ve lost all your confidence Santa – and I think I know why. I know because I’ve been there myself. And it’s okay to be honest about it, there’s absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. It all boils down to one thing:
You just aren’t happy at your current weight
You don’t feel comfortable with the way you look, and it’s really doing a number on your self-esteem. You feel like you’ve tried everything. And after all the failed diets, all the weight loss gimmicks, all the plans and programs you tried but didn’t manage to stick to, you’re starting to feel like nothing will ever work. You’re starting to lose hope, to feel like you’ll be stuck at this weight forever.
But Santa, hear me out – you are NOT stuck. I know this first hand, because I was finally able to turn things around for myself.
It all happened when I discovered SLIMQUICK Pure.
The stubborn pounds that I couldn’t get rid of for so many years – FINALLY! – started to melt right off with SLIMQUICK Pure
Once I added SLIMQUICK Pure weight loss supplements designed for women to my reduced-calorie diet and exercise program, the stubborn pounds that I couldn’t get rid of for so many years finally started to just melt right off! I finally started seeing results in my body. With SLIMQUICK Pure, my whole life and attitude towards weight loss completely turned around.
SLIMQUICK Pure weight loss supplements designed for women are the only supplements designed specifically to help women lose 3 TIMES THE WEIGHT! It helps women increase their metabolism, reduce appetite, boost energy, reduce excess water, support hormones and reduce stress.
It works because SLIMQUICK Pure has isolated the natural fat-burning component in green tea that speeds up your metabolism. It’s called BioPure Green Tea and it has been shown in a published clinical study to help overweight women lose 3 times the weight in 13 weeks, versus just dieting alone.
I’m finally looking forward to this year’s Christmas party because, thanks to SLIMQUICK Pure, I’ll be wearing that hot black dress that I haven’t been able to fit into for years!
And there’s something for you to look forward to as well: the makers of SLIMQUICK have engineered a brand new formula that is EXCLUSIVELY DESIGNED FOR MEN TOO!!!!
New SLIMQUICK Pure MEN addresses the unique challenges men face when trying to lose weight
New SLIMQUICK Pure MEN is a ground-breaking natural formula that’s engineered to help MEN LOSE 3 TIMES THE WEIGHT in less time. Its exclusive natural extract is so potent it makes New SLIMQUICK Pure MEN the most effective weight loss supplement for men.
The formula is specifically tailored to men’s unique bodies, to help burn fat, accelerate metabolism, support testosterone, reduce appetite, torch calories and increase energy levels. And, in addition to fat-purging BioPure Green Tea extracts, this natural health-conscious formula also contains antioxidants, calcium, vitamin D and zinc.
Give Yourself the Gift that Keeps on Giving – A New Body that You Love
So this year, Santa, I know exactly what I’ll be getting you for Christmas. SLIMQUICK Pure Men is what you need to get you out of this holiday rut once and for all and get you back to yourself again – the self that doesn’t feel the need to hide any longer, because he’s proud of who he is and what he can accomplish.
The only clincher is this : YOU HAVE TO START YOUR SLIMQUICK Pure MEN supplements RIGHT NOW!!! Make it happen by starting TODAY, so that by this time next Christmas, you’ll be able to give yourself the gift that you REALLY want – A new you. A happier you. A healthier you. A more confident you.
So no more shouting. No more pouting. No more crying. No more sighing. Next year, I expect to see Santa Claus coming back to town. But this time, he’ll be all decked out in a brand new slimmer trimmer suit, broad and tall, sexy smile, sack bulging, looking his best and ready to stuff all our stockings…
…and this time, Santa, expect to find us ladies feeling far more naughty than nice….
Your Friend, Holly
New SLIMQUICK Pure MEN, tailored to men’s unique bodies to help:
- Burn fat
- Accelerate metabolism
- Support testosterone
- Reduce appetite
- Burn calories
- Increase energy
New SLIMQUICK Pure Men is engineered to help men lose 3 times the weight.